Due to my previous misfortunes shame inducing wipeouts from operating mopeds
in Thailand, I was still too gun shy to drive anything and thus Colleen and I
were forced to walk and cab everywhere.
With that in mind, I came up with the brilliant idea that the two of us
should take a hike out to some rocks I had read about that were apparently
shaped like genitals and were somewhat of a local landmark. Yes,
this is what passes for entertainment in my life. Never ones to plan anything, Colleen and I
set off and were quickly regretting our decision. After nearly an hour of walking in what felt
like the most suffocating heat in the history of mankind (with many pit stops
along the way for various liquid breaks), we finally arrived at our
destination. Sadly, the rocks were extremely
underwhelming and I was starting to wish that I had just stayed in our hotel
room and watched Thai soap operas all day.
Seeing as how we had walked all this way though, we decided to explore a
little path through the forest that we saw other people coming and going
from. Not really being sure of what to
expect, I must say it was an odd surprise when after a few minutes we stumbled
upon a couple of rickety houses shacks and a large group of both Thai
and foreign potheads smoking up on some gigantic boulders overlooking the ocean. Didn't see that coming. Just a note to all non-black people: DREADSLOOK TERRIBLE AND DIRTY ON YOU. JUST SAYING.
Sadly, the genitalia rocks did not live up to the hype and I was thus
forced to stop for beers on the way back to the hotel to drown my sorrows. Oh, and then stop for pizza. And
this is why I was up over fifteen pounds since leaving Inuvik.
 | ||
| Our fake "hiking is fun" smiles.
|
With our feet sore and our bodies worn out from a lot (at
least to us!) of walking that day, Colleen again convinced me to go for a
massage. Unlike the previous day's
visit, I made sure that I had underwear on this time. While everything went peachy for me, Colleen unfortunately
fell victim to a breakdown in communications.
Earlier in the afternoon she had twisted her ankle and she thought the
massage would help. Instead, the ladies
with magic hands proceeded to destroy Colleen's ankle a little more and turn
her into a full on gimp!
 |
| Just say no to crack kids. |
 |
| You know what fixes up my busted ankle? Not getting it torqued and ripped around by a masseuse. |
With Colleen's ankle in a severely gimpy state, the two of us decided to spend our evening once again touring the many street side "bars" in Lamai Beach. Eventually, we headed to the more refined and slightly louder confines of the Sham Rock Bar. Sham Rock's is probably the busiest bar on that part of the island, with an Irish-Island theme and a Thai cover band playing the greatest rock songs ever. Not only was the band awesome, but they were also like magicians, balancing bottles on their head while playing instruments, doing the splits with said bottles on head, solving world hunger, etc. I must say, I have seen some great cover bands in my time (shout out to The Practically Hip and Wanted Dead Or Alive), but these guys definitely ranked right up there. In keeping with our tradition, Colleen insisted on hitting up the local Subway after the bar for the third night running and it is safe to say Jared ain't got shit on Colleen!
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| Note the heads....
|
~Brentski~
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