(Originally published March 31, 2008)(Pictured: The Bellagio, aka my home-away from home while in the classless heart of America, Lost Wages [or as some call it Las Vegas])
The morning of March 27, I woke up bright and early (by my standards at least) and made my way over to the MGM Grand to play their 11:00am $65 craps tournament, errr poker tournament. These tourneys are a joke, as they have next to no play and the skill level is borderline non-existent. Anyways, I managed to go pretty deep, finishing 11th/84 people, but as Momma once told me “that don’t pay the bills fool”! I hung around for a bit, playing a little $1-2 NL Hold’em, again nothing really brewing and I took a small loss of about $20. I decided to make my way over to the sports book to place some coin on that night’s NCAA Sweet 16 games. I bet $100 on a 4 game parlay. I bet on Western Kentucky (+12), Xavier (+1), and also Louisville and North Carolina to win outright. I watched the early games and won both of them, but then we HAD to go and watch Carrot Top. Anybody who knows Carrot Top knows that this guy is the master of prop comedy, and rather bizarrely he’s quite muscular. Makes for a weird combination to say the least! Either way, the red-mopped comedian put on a good show, although I’m not too sure it was worth the $60, but then again nothing in Vegas is worth what you pay for it. When we emerged from Carrot Top, I booked it straight to the Sports Book to find out the results of the late games. Turns out, I hit all 4 games and my bet paid out a nice $698. That means one thing, keep on gambling! I wasted away the rest of the night in the Luxor Poker Room, and won $105 playing $1-2 NL Hold’em, but promptly lost it as I blanked in a $65 and $55 tournaments. Can only mean one thing....time to go back to Bellagio tomorrow!
Friday was to be our last full day in Vegas, so I had to take full advantage as far as getting my money into action! I slept in late, and made my way over to Bellagio around noon and sat down at the $15-30 Limit Hold’em. I caught some hot cards early, and was up over $1000 at one point in under 2 hours at the tables. Eventually, Jon came to get me around 3:30 to go out for breakfast/lunch/dinner and I cashed out ahead about $740 for the afternoon. As we were leaving Bellagio, Slim noticed that none other than Nelly was sitting in at a poker table like 2 away from mine. While he was wearing a ridiculous hat, he was sadly not sporting a band-aid, although it may have been in his 6’10”, 600 lb. bodyguard’s pocket! That afternoon, Slim reported that he had also seen Criss Angel walking through the poker room at the Luxor. Then he disappeared. Goulet. So Super Slim and I made our way over to Jimmy Buffet’s Margaritaville for some food, and well margaritas! We both slightly over-indulged from a food standpoint and had trouble getting back to the hotel as we both felt violently ill! We managed to make it back, albeit barely and I put another $100 on a 2 game parlay, where I bet on Kansas (-12.5) and Memphis (-5) before retreating to my bed to recover for a couple of hours. Both games hit again for me and it paid out $360. So in true Brent Moreau fashion, I took the dough over to Bellagio and lost $540 playing $15-30 Limit Hold’em in less than 2 hours. Should’ve stayed in damn it! After, I went back to Luxor and played some drunk $1-2 NL Hold’Em with my homeboy and dumped off $250 playing really bad poker until the wee hours of the morning.
Saturday was pretty uneventful, involved me flying home and contemplating my life. God, I’m such a deep person. Cough, cough. Anyways, for the whole trip I booked a ridiculously small all-around gambling profit of around a couple hundred dollars (thanks NCAA, boo poker). Guess I can’t quit my day job just yet!
Stay easy peoples, and keep on truckin`!
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