After leaving the comfort and good cooking of Peter and Vanda’s place, it was time for Leeanna and I to hit the road. We had arranged to pick up our 2-man campervan on the outskirts of Melbourne and to use the next three nights to drive from Melbourne to Adelaide along the Great Ocean Road. For those not in the know, the Great Ocean Road is a stretch of highway along the southern coast of Australia that is considered one of the most beautiful driving routes in the world. This inevitably attracts large amounts of tourists who can’t drive (like me) and therefore requires signs every few kilometres reminding people what side of the road to drive on. Anyways, our trip got off to a fantastic start when I couldn’t figure out how to even get out of the industrial area where we rented the camper from. Right after that, I got even more stressed when I couldn’t find the highway, and it was safe to say within half-an-hour of leaving the rental place, Leeanna and I were both uber-stressed. Once we hit the highway though, it was smooth sailing. The first day of travelling we took in the coastal towns of Torquay, famous for Bells Beach and its subsequent surfing competition and the town of Angelsea. As far as I can tell, Angelsea is only worth mentioning because they have kangaroos that inhabit the fairways of the golf course. A bizarre sight to say the least, but then again I’ve seen weirder. Our first of what I’m sure will be many nights in caravan parks was spent in another one of the coastal towns, Lorne. By the time we set-up shop it was getting dark (we are in winter in Australia right now so darkness sets in by 5:30pm most nights), so we just cooked, ate, had some cheap cask wine and went to bed.
The next day, we were promptly slowed down by a lengthy construction delay which had traffic at a standstill. Definitely something you look for when driving along one of the country’s major tourist routes. That day, we stopped a at rainforest walk called Mait’s Rest, although I did the walk on my own as boss woman Leeanna is still very skeptical when it comes to me and my nature walks. Guess I can’t really blame her, as I have led her astray on a few occasions. The highlight of the day was supposed to be when we saw the world-famous Twelve Apostles (big stone things rising out of the ocean), but I would have to say the best part of the day was when I almost made the campervan blow-up. After pulling over to quickly stretch my legs, I attempted to start the car up, but unbeknownst to me I was doing it in third gear. Needless to say the engine started smoking heavily, the entire van filled up with smoke, and I nearly shit myself thinking I may have just burnt out our clutch in the middle of nowhere. Luckily, the van did start back up and I was able to get us back on the road, although with a slightly faster heartbeat. Night two was spent in one of the many caravan parks in the town of Warrnambool, which was effectively where the Great Ocean Road ended.
Our third day consisted of us covering as much of the driving between Warrnambool and Adelaide as we could, in hopes of a short final day of driving on Friday. We ended up covering a good amount of distance, with very little to report in the drama area. We stopped in some town that had a gigantic sink hole in the middle of it to snap some pictures and at a couple places along the ocean that seemed to be photogenic. We eventually reached our destination, Meningie. Word on the street is that Meningie is a great place if you love bird watching. Closest thing I enjoy to bird watching is viewing a chicken on a rotisserie, so you can fill in the rest of the details.
Friday morning we had a nice short drive into Adelaide (couple hundred kilometers). After dropping off our campervan that was miraculously still in one piece, we booked it over to our hotel, which was quite exciting to Leeanna as it featured “proper” beds and wouldn’t require her to use shared bathrooms and sleep in temperatures that were hovering between 5 and 10°C at night. Who says campervans aren’t fun? That night, I was in dire need of a haircut so I found some place called “Price Attack” that the guy working at the hotel had recommended to me. To sum it up, it was the worst haircut of my life, hands down. The piggish looking hairdresser, or beast with scissors as I like to call her, spent eight minutes (no joke!) cutting my hair and then charged me $30. To say she did a bad job would be doing her justice. I had to go back to the hotel and attempt to fix my haircut with my Mach 3 razor and a pair of scissors. I also enticed Leeanna into trying to fix my hair with me, but some things were beyond repair, such as my now missing sideburns and uneven buzz cut on the sides of my head. I really wish I wasn’t such a little bitch and had spoken up and told the hairdresser what I thought of her lack of scissor skills. Instead, I spent the rest of the night whining about my hair and overdosing on Italian food at some joint called Fasta Pasta. We spent the rest of the night watching cable TV, as this was a rare commodity for us since we had arrived in Australia.
Saturday morning we decided to hit up some of the tourist attractions in Adelaide, which seemed to be in short supply. First things first though, I had to pick up another campervan that Leeanna and I would be driving to Perth starting on Monday. Adelaide is definitely a city that is more known for its regions around the city, than for the actual city itself. There are vast wine regions and other quaint towns around the city. Even though we now had a vehicle, we elected to take it easy and stay in town as we had just done a lot of driving and were going to be doing a lot more. On that note, we checked out the Australian Wine Centre, the Botanic Gardens, the Art Gallery of South Australia, and the South Australian Museum. Pretty run of the mill stuff, but I will say the one good thing about most of Adelaide’s major attractions is that they are free! For dinner that night we did what we always do: go to a pub, eat a cheeseburger and wash it down with a beer. In related news I’m going to be featured on the next season of “The Biggest Loser”. Following dinner, we headed over to an Irish pub where they had a cover band that seemed to be quite fond of Melissa Etheridge songs. Yes, I can ashamedly admit I enjoyed it, although I don’t think I’m going to be purchasing any Melissa and k.d. CDs anytime soon. Also, I would like to thank the bar staff for forgetting to charge me for the pint of beer and margarita (unfortunately, I still spent $60 at the bar). Things like that always make my night that much better!
The next day was pretty typical weather-wise of what it seems to be like lately no matter where we go in Australia. Cold, rainy, and windy, aren’t things most foreigners associate with Australia, but believe me they are a fact of life in many parts of the country come winter time. That morning Leeanna and I did some shopping to prepare for our road trip that would to be commencing bright and early the next morning. Hands down my star purchases were Oprah’s biography written by Kity Kelley and a CD featuring a band called Jimmy and the Parrots that was essentially a Jimmy Buffet cover band. For $4 you can’t really complain though, no matter how bad it sounds. That afternoon I killed time just walking around the city taking pictures. For dinner that evening, we decided that we wanted Subway. So we went a driving quest that took us 45 minutes and visits to three different Subways before we found one that was open. I’m gambling that Australia has the highest Subway to person ratio in the world. Never have I savoured a submarine sandwich like the one I ate that evening. God, I love a good sub.
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