The 18th of October would mark our final day in Dingo. As much as I was excited to get out on the road again, I must also admit there was a small part of me that was sad to leave. I mean, the thought of possibly never making another works burger almost brings a tear to my eye. My last shift was pretty uneventful, although I did remember to take my camera to work so I could take pictures of all the ridiculous burgers and shit that I make on an average day. While work was okay, my laundry turned out to be quite an expensive affair as I put my $250 IPod through the washer. Just in case anyone was wondering, yeah, IPods are not very water-friendly! That evening in honour of our departure from Dingo, we decided to have a few people over to the house for drinks. Next thing I knew, it was 3:30am, and we were still pounding beers and realized Leeanna and I had to get up at 6:30am. Always seems like a good idea at the time.
As expected, after only three hours of sleep and a nice drink session, we naturally slept in on Tuesday morning. This in turn caused us to have a very frantic morning as our housemate Dan was scheduled to drive us to a place called Rossyln Bay. After saying our goodbyes to Liz and Andy at the house, we loaded into the car with Dan and set out on our 200 kilometre drive back to civilization (or so we thought). That morning, Leeanna and I were scheduled to catch a ferry out to a place called Great Keppel Island, which is a fairly large island, located right on the Great Barrier Reef about 15 kilometres off the mainland. Of course, on our drive we had to run into construction delays, so I spent most of the morning stressing if we would make it to the ferry on time. Somehow, we made it with; no word of a lie, less than a minute to spare, which if you ask me shows some pretty good time management skills. I mean, how many people do you know can time a 2.5 hour drive to the minute? That’s what I thought! After saying so long to Dan and running onto the ferry, it was nice to finally settle down and start to enjoy our “vacation”. Well at least that was the plan. My life never seems to follow its plans too well. After reaching the island in one piece, we quickly discovered that there was nowhere on the island to buy groceries or alcohol. Thankfully we did have a few snacks and light meals we had packed or else we would’ve been really S.O.L. After wandering about the island for a bit and somehow getting lost, we eventually found our accommodation (Great Keppel Island Holiday Village [6/10]). We had booked ourselves into a “tent” style room, which consists of an actual tent with a double bed and two night tables in it. Slightly different I thought, I mean, a tent with a double bed in just doesn’t seem to invoke that “nature” style feeling. After checking in, we headed out to explore the island, and what a beaut it is! As mentioned, Great Keppel Island is located right on the Great Barrier Reef, and from a beach point of view has to be one of Australia’s great hidden gems. There are probably less than a couple hundred people on the whole island, and if you want you can have a beach all to yourself. As Leeanna and I were strolling along that night, we happened to see a guy fishing right on the beach who looked like he had a monster catch. After he struggled for a good fifteen minutes, he finally reeled in a fair size sting ray. It was around this time that someone else fishing there mentioned that the day before someone had caught a tiger shark in the exact same spot. Now I don’t know about you, but when someone is catching tiger sharks on beaches that I’m supposed to be swimming in, alarm bells start going off in my head. That evening, I set out to make us pasta for dinner (MasterChef Moreau!) and with a great stroke of luck ran into a guy in the kitchen who had just gotten married. No, that’s not the good part. The good part was, the wedding party had an abundance of alcohol (I had none) and this kind scholar was willing to sell it to me on the cheap. Twenty dollars later, I had myself a bottle of rum and we were set for the night. Unfortunately, the power went out that night at about 9:30pm, which would end up being a reoccurring theme every night (no one told us this when we checked in). So all we could do was drink in the dark and hide in our tent from the possums which were lurking everywhere and causing a ruckus!
The next morning we awoke bright and early, as the birds make sure you wake up at 4:00am. Now normally I love nature, but I hate fucking crows! These things just would not shut up, and I must say put a big damper on the start of the final leg of our Australian journey. After finally going back to sleep for a bit, we awoke at a more human time and made our way down to the beach to try our hand at some water sports. We both signed up for the “Great Day Out” package, which was supposed to include a tube ride, use of a catamaran, snorkel gear, and a kayak hire. Because it was so windy, we were unable to go tubing or use a catamaran, so we had to settle for kayaking and snorkel gear. After perfecting our paddle strokes, Leeanna and I set off in our kayak for a beach on the other side of the island. Let me just say, to anyone who has never kayaked on the ocean; way more difficult than on a lake. I mean between the waves and the man-eating sharks, it’s quite a task. Once we arrived safely at the beach, we attempted to snorkel a bit, although this was thwarted by Leeanna’s fear of water, some dodgy equipment, and my general fear of tiger sharks. Instead, we opted to lie on the beach and get burnt to a crisp, like the pasty white folk we are. That night, we decided to reward our hard day of tanning and paddling by having some drinks at the only pub on the island before making our way back to the resort. When we went back, we tried to sit out on our little deck in front of our tent, but we were constantly being harassed by possums. Most people would just ignore the possums, but I’m a baby and felt I would be much safer curled up in my tent. Like the night before, the power went out at about 9:30pm and the resort went quiet...except for the sounds of possums and birds. Despite my fears, that night I made a run to the community kitchen to grab some food, all the while being careful not to be ravaged be a five-pound possum. Upon my return to the tent I realized I had left the door to the kitchen open, which is a big no-no! Next thing I know, Leeanna and I can hear possums banging around in the kitchen, but I was too afraid to leave the tent and do anything about it! Finally after what felt like an eternity, I grew a very small pair of testicles and decided to venture out into the darkness with my cell phone flashlight. Sure enough, possums had been banging around the kitchen and just everywhere for that matter. Luckily, a girl who was inherently much braver than I came by and shooed away the possums as if they were nothing. All the while, Leeanna and I nearly shit our pants trying to walk to the bathroom, as every noise we heard we thought was a possum out to get us! Eventually, I returned to my bed like a coward and cried myself to sleep having nightmares about possums dressed up like the cast of “Glee”.
Thursday morning, we were again awoken by the painful sound of crows crowing at 4:00am. After my near death experience the night before with the possums, I was in no mood, but alas here we were trapped on this island. It ended up raining pretty much all day, which sucked because we were supposed to go tubing which we had not been able to do the day before either. We ended up just hanging about most of the day and nursing our third degree sunburns from the day before. Around dinner time when it finally stopped raining, we went from some nature walks, although Leeanna is not too keen on walks these days due to my poor navigational and walk-time-estimation skills. That night we went to the pub for dinner as we were effectively out of food and we decided that we were also just fed up with the island! We would be on the first ferry out in the morning. At night, it was more of the same, with the possums strolling around the resort like they own the place and me being terrified I was going to get my eyes gouged out every time I walked to the bathroom at night!
In all seriousness people, Chuck Norris doesn’t kill people; possums do.
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